Lessons I Taught My Kiddos!
How I taught to focus on What Matters Most!
Practicing Intuition
Water Archetypes
Water is the season of Winter.
The reflection on our results and looking forward to making more begins with resting our sleepy heads for spring. Next season. Right now we move slowly and calculate our best direction. When Water is rested, she return for Wood. Wood represents everything sprouting in life. Water creates wood, as we all know. We water our plants.
Plants sprout from the earth, even if you put just a bit in a flower pot. She will sprout if you give her Water.
The Water Element develops within us from encouragement. “You are the perfect person to walk your path, keep going, keep moving.
Water is the beginning of movement. Taking a step. “You can do it.” Leaving Moms watchful eyes. “It’s ok, you are safe.” And then she peeks back at you to make sure. And then…
I don’t have a story of me discouraging my kiddos, but I have one where I discouraged discouraging.
I was hanging with the other parents of the girls on Sacred’s soccer team. One said that her daughter was going to become a dentist because she knew she couldn’t make a living playing soccer. I said, “Oh, well good thing that Sacred doesn’t know that.”
I sat by myself after that.
The Water Element develops the Ruler and the Innocent.
The Ruler is the problem solver, fair rules maker, compassionate, loved Leader of All. A man who can command respect because he respects his men, and he loves the ladies. No, not like that…he is willing to die for feminine values.
The Innocent is the feminine energy of virginity. Innocence not taken by a man. Child-like innocence. Where everyone gets to be the hero, and anyone can do anything they want. Like the children in Mary Poppins. Mary is the Fire Element Caretaker, but the children are the innocence that she protects, and help them achieve “flying a kite with daddy.”
The Ruler is intended to hold and enforce the values of the Innocent. The feminine.
If the Ruler receives dis-couragement, he will be afraid to keep moving. He may shift out of balance toward the Yin, the feminine.
You can’t handle the truth!
The Politician: He gathers his reassurance by title. His good intentions are distracted by procedure and policy, aka red tape, or even worse, conflicts of interest. Serving others becomes more self serving.
The OverAchiever: He gathers his reassurance from his achievements. He responds to every problem with “doing more,” and is disappointed with anyone who doesn’t strive, even fight, to achieve. “Achievement proves you aren’t scared.”
He may shift out of balance toward the Yang, the masculine.
The Dictator: He defines himself by the power and control he has over people. His reassurance is what he can make people do or believe. He uses punishment or oppression to force his ideals and beliefs on others.
The Judge: He defines himself by “right and wrong” not knowing that there is no such thing. Just different paths. Success and failure. Try again. His fixation on right and wrong, which should be determined by the result, not a belief or opinion, prevents creative solutions.
I have voted Democrat and Republican. The only change in my personal results was when the Dem was in office, he punished me for not carrying Health Insurance that I had been terminated from, for helping a woman with a medical condition. I was fined for not paying for insurance that wouldn’t cover True Health. And when the Republican took office, he removed my punishment.
And some Judge will chastise me for noticing that difference. LMAO.
If the Innocent receives discouragement she will be afraid to keep moving. She might shift toward the Yang, the masculine.
The Idealist: She gathers her reassurance from high standards. Unfortunately, nobody can satisfy her standards, not even herself.
And nobody benefits from imposing boundaries on them…”you should eat vegan. If you don’t I must find better people.” LOL
The Skeptic: She gathers her reassurance from herself, and nobody gets in unless you agree with me on everything. Obviously, her rigidity of belief and distrust of anyone “not on my side,” prevents receiving the value of other perspectives.
Idgie is the Skeptic. Ruth is the Victim. Evelyn is the Idealist. And Ninny was the dreamer. And also Idgie. The Skeptic. LOL. Those geeky drama queens make you think, right?
And Jerry, has some theories of his own…
And to be fair, most people do not share value, they share criticism.
How has your life been personally changed…better results…when who you voted for, won. Or are you suggesting that you would only notice the results when everyone believed your way. “He was sabotaged by the republican/democratic house. Or he would have been great.” LMAO.
Or she might shift toward the Yin, the feminine.
That’s the Poltergeist Girl. “They are coming.”
The Victim: She gathers her reassurance from caretakers. “I need help.” Clinging to a need for care, she has faith that someone will show up. And they do. Those that prey on vulnerability and gullibility, “show up for you.”
Actual Caretakers know that you need to grow up and take responsibility. And when you are taking care, I offer help. A Caretaker knows the difference and will let a helpless person find their strength. But watch out for the predators.
The Dreamer: She gathers her reassurance from her imagination. I will just think about what I want and wait for it to appear. Again, the ugly hand of Responsibility. You will have to take action toward your dreams. It’s Natural Law.
And if you keep your head in dream world, you cannot notice and respond to problems. We all got ’em.
Yes, it was moms dream, to raise kids this way. In Nature. But she didn’t respond to her own needs. She is loved for the sacrifice…
Earth Archetypes
Earth is the season of “harvest”
Oh, I know that isn’t really a season, but in terms of the flow of energy in Nature, aka Natural Law, that was a point of distinction. Not a full season, but the bounty of all our efforts. Measuring, literally, “What you sow, you shall reap.” And then you rest.
The bible seems to understand Natural Law!?!
The Earth element is developed within us from the nurturing care and safety of your mother. “I will care for all your needs, and if anyone gets through the protection of your daddy, they will find a pissed off Momma Bear!”
And then, when we make cookies together, I get irritated by misses and mistakes instead of nurturing and teaching. I got waaaay better…
By the time we had Westy, I was pretty good. He was around 3 and decided to help in setting the table. I heard silverware crashing to the floor and ran into the kitchen. “Westy, what are you doing?” His little eyes looked up at me and said, “I wanna help.”
I helped him count out 7 forks and spoons, and instructed how to put them beside the plates, and he felt the value of contributing to a larger cause. Significance.
Someone taught our culture that significance means being better than someone, and somehow that got translated into being right. That couldn’t be more wrong. Telling someone that they are bad or wrong isn’t significance. Significance is helping someone.
In our culture it is very significant to entertain. To make people feel and laugh. And yes, that helps.
The Earth energy is our harvest and our value, and it develops the Revolutionary and the Everyperson.
The Revolutionary is the masculine version of finding a better way. “OMG, you sliced the bread. Revolutionary.” In our current culture, the Revolutionary is called the Outlaw, because if you don’t do things the way the Man tells you to, there is something wrong with you!
That sounds like an abusive man, and the feminine should protect the imagination of innocence.
The Everyperson is the feminine version of nobody left behind. “Hey little one, come and join the group. You are just as important as anyone else, and you will get your fair share.”
If the Everyperson does not receive nurturing or the safety of a mother, she will not value herself. She may shift out of balance toward the Yin, the feminine.
The Sellout: No, not the stool pigeon…she sells out her own needs and desire for the inclusion of others. While Jesus sacrificed with honor, her sacrifice is viewed as inappropriate to the needs being met.
The Rescuer: She endangers her life and her feminine values for the protection of another. Perhaps not allowing someone to feel the consequences of bad behavior?
She may shift out of balance toward the Yang, the masculine.
The Fanatic: She shifts more black and white, with feminine sensitivity, so anyone with a different perspective becomes a criticism of their own. “How dare you attack me, by choosing differently. Clearly you are calling me an idiot for what I chose.”
The Patriot: She now feels justified to attack, to hurt and criticize others to defend her beliefs and perspective. “My way is the only way.” Nearly 100% man.
Edith is the Sell-out. Archie is the Patriot. Meathead is the Rescuer, of Gloria, the Fanatic. Robert did the Fanatic some justice too!
If the Revolutionary does not receive nurturing or the safety of a mother, he will not value himself. He may shift out of balance toward the Yin, the feminine.
The Malcontent: She focuses all her energy on what is wrong, and doesn’t move forward with the solution, so she is challenged to be happy or satisfied with the way things are.
The Counter-culture: She decides that anything counter to the trends is the best direction, without actually evaluating the circumstances.
He may shift out of balance toward Yang, the masculine.
DrStone as Esther, his Feminine half
The Radical: This dude has defined himself by the fight against everything that is. Some people see me as a Radical because I have helped the blind to see and the crippled to walk, I stand firmly on feminine values, and I paint my fingernails. But I ain’t fighting anyone. I help people feel better every day. I am sorry that Big Medicine, a trillion dollar per year Bizness, finds me to be a Radical because I won’t comply with their way, which is that medical conditions can not and MAY NOT be helped.
The Paranoid: This dude feels attacked. Convinced that the trend, the mainstream, the way things are, are trying to end his perspective. But if the mainstream controlling power takes your money away for helping a woman with a medical condition, I think you might be right. They are trying to end your perspective.
Yes sir, the masculine is trying to end the feminine perspective. The respect for people and Mother Earth. Nothing hurts my heart more than a mother hardening her innocent children and baby girls, to survive in this hard world. But that is not understanding the feminine. That is not seeing where this direction leads. That is NOT including every perspective. And that may lead to our demise.
“Everything on this planet has evolved, to kill humans.” After Earth.
Metal Archetypes
Metal is the season of Autumn.
After harvest, we reflect on our results, we look ahead at improving next season, and we let go of anything not serving that inspired vision. Including discouragement and self doubt. Is that self discouragement?
The Metal energy in us is developed through validation and the father relationship. “You are perfect just the way you are, and daddy will protect you from anyone hurting you.” And then when you are 7 and flood the bathtub so it pours down on our kitchen table, daddy hurts you. A smack on the butt. You were laughing at how funny all the water all over the floor was, while I was scolding you, but alas, I never did it again. I could feel the violation of Natural Law.
Now I might say, “Ha ha, I made bigger messes than this when I was a kid. The not so funny part is the clean up.” And help them take responsibility for the mess.
My kids were pretty validated! (I’m not sure about their grammar though.)
When Gates punched a pushy little girl, I understood. I punched people until I was 25. Mostly just bullies, but I decided it wasn’t a great resource, so I taught him what I had learned.
When my girls named our former president, Barack O’Brownskin, I laughed with them, their innocent, literal minds observed brown skin and had no idea why anyone would judge someone by color of skin, and I taught them what I had learned. “We have to avoid any mention of it, because it is still happening, and this is how bad it was…”
I even validated how awkward that feels, to not be able to describe certain things in certain ways and that the rules change all the time.
In my school, it was pretty normal to say the N-word, and I had no idea it was something bad. So I said it to my science teacher. Not at him, but to him. He was fairly kind, but pretty intense! Picture a furrowed brow and pursed lips, and a sensitive little boy who feels intentions! Well, not so little, that was grade 10, so I “should have known better!”
Now I say, “If I should have known better, shouldn’t you be talking to my teachers?” I didn’t think of that until I was told “I should have…” right around 1000 times. Not very validating.
The Metal energy develops the Creator and the Sage.
Sorry boys, the Sage is the feminine energy, so you might want to listen to their wisdom. But never fear, we all have equal amounts of Yin and Yang energy in our bodies, so you can access your feminine wisdom if you desire!
The Creator is the maker of things. The provider, creating an income and resources for his family. The builder of schools, homes, and even the structure of a culture. Looking to the feminine, Sage, for direction. The Sage can see far off in the future, and predict where each direction will lead. The Sage may see you are headed smack into a wall, and the Sage may decide that the pain 
will be a better teacher than her wisdom. But she would not allow our demise, so she chooses the best direction for all, and all their expansion. Healthy expansion.
To include and help more people, not to hoard resources.
If the Creator lacks validation or a protector, he will not trust himself. He may shift out of balance toward Yin, the feminine.
The Perfectionist: She sets her standards so that neither she, nor anyone else, can be quite enough. She may even look good on the outside, perfectly packaged, so you marry her. Lord help you.
The Fixer: She spends all her energy focused on fixing other people’s problems to validate her existence and worth. It won’t take long for her to fall apart from the lack of her own care.
He may shift out of balance toward Yang, the masculine.
The Workaholic: He defines himself by career goals, actions and achievements, and has a LOT to brag about. He played the game and won, but inside he regrets what he has had to do to win big.
The Laborer: He defines himself by how “hard” he works, but doesn’t have much to show for it, because in reality, he traded his time and body (and often health) for security. But he resents the trade, so he criticizes people who don’t work hard or do what it takes to survive in this hard world.
If the Sage lacks validation or a protector, she will not trust herself. She may shift out of balance toward Yin, the feminine.
The Loner: She feels like nobody can really understand things the way she does, so she pretty much keeps to herself.
The Over-Analyzer: She considers, and contemplates, sleeps on it, and thinks some more. Stuck. Paralysis by analysis. Lacking forward movement. Failure to Launch.
The Guru, Know it All man, Loner, Over-analyzer, and Know it All woman.
She may shift out of balance toward Yang, the masculine.
The Guru: He defines himself by his superiority over others, so he pretty much keeps to himself.
The Know it All: He defines himself by his knowledge, which was just some other idiots opinion, but that is what he learned, and that is the way it is. His certainty prevents curiosity, the observation of results, and the ability to shift to a different approach. Stuck. Making the same mistakes over and over. On the hamster wheel.
And every one of them, just…need…validation and protection.